torchwoodteaboy | [RL WITH SULU]

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[RL WITH SULU]

Ianto lay in his bed upstairs, a book laying face down on his chest. He had been trying to read for the better part of an hour, but had found himself drifting more often than not, and on the third read-through of the same page he'd given up and just put it down. And he'd been drifting since then as well, not really awake enough to be doing anything other than just lying there, not really tired enough to really go to sleep. More and more each day, while no one else was around, he found himself in this sort of a state, a sort of standby mode that was disturbing in the fact that it didn't really bother him. That nothing really bothered him anymore, because he really couldn't dredge up enough energy to be bothered about it.

He brought a hand up to his face, running it across his eyes. He...he couldn't keep lying to himself like this. At first he thought it had simply been his imagination, that things were just progressing slowly, that was all. For all that he had worried that things wouldn't get better, he had hoped that they would, Sulu continuously helping him be optimistic in that fact, and so the fact that he was going backwards, now, getting worse, it... It was crushing. And he had no idea what he was going to do about it. No idea. The even worse fact of the matter was that he was slowly convincing himself that there was nothing to do about it. That he'd never get better. That it was too late, and he couldn't do anything about it now even if he tried. Which was the mindset he kept spiraling down and dragging himself out of as it approached that time when Sulu would be making his appearance for the night.

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Sulu shrugged noncommittally as he shot Jack an appreciative look, the slight smile on his face enough indication that yes, he'd read right there, and that was exactly what Sulu had planned. He was glad that Jack had understood his meaning, because he'd really hate to have to spell it out but at the same time, he would have done it if he'd had to. This could be the last chance Jack got to spend some time alone with Ianto for a while, if McCoy needed to keep him for too long.

"Works for me," he said, "I have to take care of the kettle, anyway, since that was my responsibility from the start. I..." And for a moment, he thought that maybe he should leave; let the two of them have the night and then take Ianto to McCoy the next day, or whenever the hell McCoy allowed him to be taken in. He knew his hesitation was showing but he tried to push past it. "I can be up in a few minutes."

Jack nodded back to Sulu, over Ianto's head so he couldn't see him doing it, although he did catch that moment of hesitation, so he sent him a definite look as well. "Great. We'll be upstairs waiting for you then," he said, forcefully, making it clear that Sulu was not allowed to leave on his account, not at all. That they both wanted to be there, so they were, damn it, because if this was the one last chance, he wasn't going to deny anyone that kind of a chance, least of all Sulu.

Jack turned to Ianto. "Sound good to you?" he asked, looking down at him. Ianto merely nodded. He was a lot more tired than he'd originally thought, he supposed. Jack just took in a breath, before nodding again. "Right," he said, "upstairs we go, then." Bending down, he hooked a hand underneath Ianto's knees, and another around his shoulders, and lifted. Ianto, catching on that Jack was lifting him, wrapped his arms around Jack's neck and held on tight as he was once again hoisted into the air. He blushed, embarrassed that they had to be doing this for him, but that's just the way things had to be, and he certainly wasn't going to try walking again.

"Don't take too long, yeah?" Ianto said to Sulu, throwing it over Jack's shoulder as they headed out of the kitchen and down the hallway. He'd really prefer not to have fallen asleep by the time Sulu made it upstairs, and if Sulu took his time doing the dishes, then he couldn't make any promises that he won't have by then.

"I won't," Sulu told Ianto as he was carried off by Jack. Truthfully, he was considering staying down there for a while to give him and Jack time to talk and just take comfort in one another, but selfish as it was, he wanted to be there too. Who knew what McCoy would have to do to get Ianto back into shape, and who knew if Sulu or Jack would get visitation rights during it?

He rinsed out the kettle, strainer and mugs, draining his own before dumping the last bits of tea down the drain from the other two, and once he was sure he'd taken a good ten minutes cleaning the kettle and mugs, he moved on to the pan Jack had used for cooking. He found himself grinning a bit wryly, wondering what his mother would say if she found out he had done the dishes of his own free will for somebody, without being guilted into it first.

And then he made a face as he considered the fact that maybe, if he took Ianto to San Francisco, they would run into his parents. That would be godawful for multiple reasons, but the image was only broken when he nearly scalded himself with the hot water from the tap. Swearing under his breath, he forced himself to finish up the dishes quickly. Once that was done... he dawdled a little. He made sure everything was where it should be and took his time making his way to the stairs and then up them, not wanting to break up whatever moment the other two were having.

Ianto sighed, resting his head on Jack's shoulder and just submitting himself to being carried up the stairs by the other man. When they reached the top, Jack paused, not even winded from the climb, and looked into the bedroom before heading to the bathroom first. "Jack, I..." Ianto started, but Jack shook his head, cutting Ianto off. "Let's get you ready for bed, alright? Then we can do the talking." So Ianto nodded, and shut his mouth.

Jack stepped into the bathroom, standing in the middle of it for a few moments before speaking up again. "Alright. I'm asking you honestly, here. Do you think I can set you down on your feet without you passing out on me? No walking, no exerting yourself, I just..." He wanted to give Ianto the chance to at least try and function normally. Ianto bit his lip, and nodded. "I... I think I can, yeah."

Jack paused, before nodding back. "Alright. We're. We're going to try this, okay. But if you think for even a second that you're going to pass out, you tell me. And you can forget about asking me to leave. It's not like it isn't anything that I've seen before, alright?" Ianto blushed, but nodded, prompting Jack to go on. "Alright, here goes nothing." He bent, putting Ianto down on the ground gently, keeping his arm on his shoulders as he waited for him to steady himself.

"Alright?" he asked. Ianto nodded again, reaching out to put a hand on the wall, steadying himself as the room did swim in and out of focus a little, but not enough to really be worrisome. Ianto was grateful that Jack was at least thoughtful enough to turn to the side as he went about his business using the toilet and washing his hands (holding onto the wall and making the one step between the toilet and the sink hadn't been too bad, although the little pins of light had told him not to push it any more than that). Jack stood by, silently keeping an eye on him as he went so far as to even brush his teeth, taking the opportunity to do so now that there was someone there spotting him as he did.

It was a little awkward, the two of them standing there in silence, Jack just watching, but Ianto couldn't bring himself to care too much, and pretty soon, he was as ready as he was going to get, and Jack was lifting him once more and carrying him back out and into the bedroom. He set Ianto down beside the bed, on his feet once more, before turning the blankets back and letting Ianto crawl in himself, for which Ianto was grateful. He felt at least a little in control of what was going on with himself, even if Jack was watching his every move. Ianto made sure to settle himself in the middle of his actually pretty enormous bed, leaving room on both sides for the others, should they decide to join him. Which he hoped they would, although who really knew if they would. He was still a little wary of the pair of them being angry at him, which is why when Jack tugged the blankets over him and moved to sit on the edge of the bed, Ianto spoke up. "Jack. I... I'm sorry I--" But Jack cut him off.

"Don't," Jack said. "I know you are, but. I... Not now, alright? I can't listen to you apologizing to me right now, I can't." So Ianto nodded, and shut his mouth again. Jack sighed, swinging his legs up on the bed, moving to lounge against the headboard, not quite laying down, but not really sitting up either. "You can save it for after you get better, yeah? Prove me wrong. Prove to me that you can change."

Ianto nodded, taking Jack's hand in his own, Jack moving to wrap his other hand around it at just how cold the touch was. How had he not noticed that it'd been colder than normal before? Probably, he supposed, because he just hadn't wanted to notice. He hadn't wanted there to be anything wrong, so there wasn't, as far as he had been concerned. But now, looking down at Ianto, he knew that he'd missed things. Important things. "I should be apologizing too, you know," he said, quietly. "That I didn't see this coming. That I couldn't have caught it before it got this bad."

Ianto shook his head. "It's not your fault. Or Sulu's, for that matter. It's just...I drew the short straw. Again. So now...I'm dealing with the consequences. But..." Ianto bit his lip. "It'll be okay, you'll see. It'll all be fine." And Ianto almost believed that, too. Too bad that Jack was a bit harder to convince than that, though. So he just sat there, Ianto's hand clutched between the two of his own, warming it up just through his touch alone, before Sulu's footsteps could be heard on the stairs, and Ianto looked to the doorway, watching for Sulu to appear in it.

When Sulu did show up at the door, he was surprised to find that he didn't really feel like he was intruding on anything. It wasn't that Jack and Ianto weren't having a moment or anything - at a time like this, there was no way they couldn't be - but all the same, it didn't feel as though he were walking in on something he shouldn't be a part of. He supposed it was because they were all in the same boat, here; all three hoping for Ianto to get better but fearing that he wouldn't, wanting to spend as much time with each other as possible, in case it didn't end well...

The fact that there was a space on the bed for him didn't escape his notice, and he smiled a little at that, moving to the empty side, toeing off his shoes as he reached the bed before climbing in - under the covers, unlike Jack, because he wanted to give up as much of his body heat to Ianto as he could. He'd use his comm to send a message to McCoy after Ianto fell asleep, and maybe he'd get up and do some pacing, or even steal a coat and walk up and down the block a few times, but for now he was going to stay exactly where he was. His pent up frustration could wait. "Hey," he finally said softly, to both of them, though his eyes were fixed on Ianto as he addressed him directly, "Are you feeling okay enough to sleep?" Even though they all knew he only ever felt like sleeping, nowadays.

Ianto let out a soft breath of amusement at that question, but had to stop himself responding as he'd first wanted to. Stopped himself from pointing out that sleeping was probably the only thing he ever felt okay enough to be able to do anymore. "Yeah, I. I'm definitely okay to sleep," he said, as he shifted closer to Sulu, slightly, not taking his hand out of Jack's nor moving away from Jack purposefully, but because he wanted to get closer to the body heat that Sulu was offering.

Granted, he didn't move as close as he wanted to. Not because Jack was there, but because...he wasn't sure whether Sulu was alright with that. Wasn't sure if Sulu was still mad, or well, not sure if he was mad enough not to want to be pressed close to Ianto like that. So he didn't. But he wanted. He wanted to be pressed close to the pair of them, warmed from both sides, safe and protected and warm, but he knew that he'd messed up, and he probably wouldn't get that.

Jack sighed, gripping Ianto's hand for a few more moments, before letting it go, moving to stand and kicking off his own shoes, shrugging out of his braces. He undid the buttons of his dress shirt before he took that off as well, hanging it on the post at the end of the bed before lifting up the covers and sliding in himself. He knew that this was what Ianto would want, after all. That it's really what he wanted as well. That he hoped this wasn't the last chance he'd ever get to do this, but if it were...then he wasn't going to waste it. "Better?" he asked. Ianto nodded, smiling softly at him. "Yeah," he replied. There was still the fact that they were further away then he would have liked, but. At least Jack had made himself comfortable as well.

Sulu shifted towards Ianto after a moment, his frustration and annoyance all taking backseat to the fact that he wanted to be there for Ianto. Admittedly, he didn't get as close as he would have if Jack hadn't been there, but he just wasn't that sure about how Jack would really take all of this. He'd play it by ear and only do what the other two men were comfortable with, until he felt out what was okay to do.

"I'll talk to McCoy in a little while," he told them both, hoping they wouldn't take his delaying the wrong way. Honestly, the only reason he hadn't done it right then and there was because he'd wanted to get the most out of his time with Ianto before they had to go up to the ship. If they went up to the ship. When they would, he scolded himself. He smiled at Ianto a little apologetically. "I just want to get a breather here, first. It's been a long day."

Ianto smiled back at him, shaking his head and reaching out a hand to grasp Sulu's. "It's alright," he said. "You need to get your rest too, same as anyone." He squeezed Sulu's hand too, to let him know that he wasn't going anywhere soon. That it would be alright for one more night, for Sulu to rest and get in contact with McCoy and prepare himself for whatever it was that came next, Ianto wasn't exactly sure what that might be.

Jack reached out to take Ianto's other hand in his own. If he could reach, he'd probably grab Sulu's too, show him that he supported him in this, that he was grateful that the other man was there, both for Ianto and for himself. "Talking to McCoy can wait," he said, with a nod, "I'm not going to force you go go on the comms right now and call him up. Besides. You're going to want to catch him at a good time, anyway. Both of you are going to need to rest up before you go there, and if he's anything like any other doctors I know, as soon as he finds out he's going to want you to come in as soon as possible, so he can get started. Might as well enjoy one more night at home and head in in the morning, yeah?"

He looked between the two of them, looking to see if they agreed with him on that. He shot Sulu a look as well, one that Ianto could see, thanking him for not jumping right on calling McCoy up. Much as Jack wanted Ianto to get better, if... If things didn't work out right, Jack wanted to have this one last chance to lie next to Ianto, to hold his hand and be with him. His one last chance...to say goodbye. Because if that's what it came to again, at least. At least he'll have had that chance, this time around.

"Exactly," Sulu agreed to Jack's sentiments, giving him the firmest, most honest smile he could muster in that moment. He wanted to reassure Jack as much as he could, but so far all of his efforts had been directed towards Ianto. He'd even let himself crumble, just a little, in front of Jack, which he knew was the exact opposite of helpful for the other man. He'd have to make it up to him. He would make it up to him. He knew Jack was more prone to negativity - realism, part of his mind said - than Sulu was, and now he was somewhat prepared to handle it.

Squeezing Ianto's hand to reassure him as well, closing his eyes and leaning his head so that it rested on Ianto's shoulder. He wasn't tired - exhausted, sure, but not tired - and he didn't give off the impression that he was going to sleep. It was just a way to keep Ianto close to him until the other fell asleep and he did what he did best, which was finding a way to do the impossible.

Ianto shifted a little closer to Sulu, at the head resting on his shoulder, for both the warmth and the comfort of the other man's presence with him there. Now that he was laying down again, he was hard pressed not to let his eyes start drooping again, and it was only a matter of minutes, he knew, before he was out like a light, dead to the world for the next few hours. During which time, Jack would probably get up and leave. It was nothing personal to think that, but that's what Jack always did. Got up and left during the night. Especially if there was something bothering him, something that made him even more restless than usual, and well. That would certainly be the case, here.

He shifted his head to look at Jack, his eyes sad, apologetic, and most of all inquiring as he looked at the other man. He couldn't say it out loud, but he could hopefully convey it all with his gaze. He wanted something normal. Something nice. Wanted the pair of them close, and not to leave either of them out. Jack looked back at him for a moment, meeting his gaze with his own, world-weary blue eyes, before giving the other man a sad smile and a tiny shake of his head, and shifting closer as well, until soon Ianto was pressed between the two of them, warmed from both sides, and a lot more reassured about their feelings for him, that was for certain.

"When I imagined the first time I got to go to bed with the pair of you, this wasn't quite what I had in mind," Ianto said, his voice obviously tired but also light, matching the tone of his joke. He definitely felt better to have both of them with him at that moment. Jack chuckled, and Ianto's heart swelled to hear the noise.

Sulu grinned at that, nudging Ianto's knee with his own as he shook his head a little. "Yeah, well, I hope this isn't that disappointing," he said wryly, cracking an eye open to look at Ianto as best he could before looking to Jack as well, still sympathetic but letting his good humor show through. Really - before, when that entire drunk text messaging thing had gone down, Sulu had been more than a little put off by the entire idea of spending much time with Jack at all. He'd liked the man well enough but, well. He also knew there was a hierarchy here and he wanted to steer clear of it for as long as possible, to keep the fact that he wasn't Jack out of Ianto's mind for as much as he could.

Now, though, after everything he'd been through with Jack, the idea wasn't so bad. Not that he'd say anything now, or even later - it was just the fact that... well. Jack had Sulu's loyalty now, and that only made their situation that much easier to deal with. And maybe when Ianto was better they could really talk about this fantasy of his as an actual possibility. Maybe.

Ianto shook his head, smiling and chuckling a little as he shut his eyes, tilting his head sideways to rest against Jack's shoulder. "No...not in the least," he said, softly. "I've finally got the pair of you right where I want you. How could something like that be disappointing?"

Jack shrugged, being careful not to jostle Ianto too much as he did so. "I dunno. We could at least be naked," he said, attempting for the same level of humor that Ianto was going for, something more normal, more like what they would normally be bantering. And while it wasn't quite there, while there were still some shadows in Jack's tone and Ianto could hear that and Jack could hear it himself, he was trying, at least. Which was something. At least while Ianto was still awake, he would try his hardest to be there for him.

"Well," Ianto said, "yeah, I guess. I think it's warmer with the clothes on, though, as sad as I am to admit it, so." He yawned. "You'll just have to wait for next time, if you were expecting anything more exciting than this, yeah? Hope that it's not too much of a letdown for you."

"Nah," Jack said, reaching out and running a hand through Ianto's hair, "I can take a rain check. You look ready to fall asleep, the pair of you." Ianto nodded against his shoulder, making a little sound of agreement. He was tired, after all. That nap on the kitchen table had caught up with him, and now the exhaustion was back with a vengeance.

Sulu rolled his eyes under his eyelids at the mere idea of getting naked right then and there, though he knew that Jack was just joking. Which was nice, really; after all this was over, he sincerely hoped that Jack would be able to let go of the things that had happened and go back to an attitude at least somewhat like his old one. He knew it wouldn't be easy for the other man, and so somebody was going to have to help Jack with all of it. ...He'd have to talk to McCoy about it, probably when they were actually in the medbay.

"Not quite yet for me," Sulu said quietly, shaking his head very slightly against Ianto's shoulder. "I just gravitate towards the most comfortable position. I can't help it if this is it, it's just logic." Well. Maybe not complete logic, but still. It was better than sitting up against the headboard, or something. His thumb stroked the back of Ianto's hand, assuring him that just because Sulu wasn't going to sleep didn't mean Ianto shouldn't.

Ianto didn't think that he could fight his way back from the verge of sleep, even if he tried. So he just let himself accept it, let himself accept that he was being pulled further and further into a state of unconsciousness, and just went with it. He shifted his hand in Sulu's grasp, letting him know without having to say anything, without having to open his eyes or pick up his head, that he understood. And the movement was small enough that it also let the other man know that he was sinking fast, and that if there was anything to say to him before he was out, it better be said quickly.

"Can't help it if I'm comfortable to lean against," Ianto said, softly. "M'not going to move anywhere any time soon. Probably make for a pretty decent pillow, all things considered."

In all honesty...if Sulu were to say something to McCoy about talking to Jack, if McCoy were to suggest talking to him about everything...Jack would probably agree to it. He wasn't really one to believe in counseling or anything of the sort, but. At this point, anything that might help was worth at least giving it a try. For Ianto's sake, and for Sulu's and even Gwen's, as much as it was for Jack's own.

"Oh yeah?" Jack asked, softly. "And how do I compare, then?" Ianto smiled, shifting his head a little to nudge Jack's shoulder that he was leaning against. "Not half bad, really," he replied, sleepily. "Though Sulu here could give you a run for your money..."

Sulu grinned at that, opening his eyes again to give Jack a good-natured wink. He couldn't help being pretty good as a pillow, since he just happened to spread out wherever he was and become one with the bed. Still, he knew that Ianto would never be able to decide between the two of them, for anything really, and that was... okay. Sulu was okay with that. Which was a little surprising, given how often he'd felt a little outranked by Jack in more than one way.

"You are comfortable," Sulu told Ianto quietly, keeping his grip on Ianto's hand firm, not wanting to let go for the world. "Comfortable and great. Don't forget that, all right? And when you wake up, we're going to get you back in order." When Ianto woke up, they'd fix everything. It was the only option.

Ianto made a noise of agreement, not really being awake enough to say much more. Jack shifted his hand to run through Ianto's hair again, a trick that he had found out worked on the other man a long time ago, and had used liberally ever since. He tried not to take advantage of that fact, but. Especially now, it was hard not to use it, not to want to help Ianto settle down, even if he himself wasn't anywhere close to falling asleep. It only took a minute, not even, before Ianto's breathing was evened out, his body relaxed in between them in the way that only the deepest of sleeps could bring about.

Jack stayed silent for a few more moments, running his hand through Ianto's hair out of habit more than anything else, shifting to press a gentle kiss to Ianto's forehead before sighing. "You... You really believe that everything will work out for this, don't you...?" he inquired, although it was more of a statement than an actual question. "You're not just telling him that to keep his hopes up?"

Sulu was far more liberal with his attempts to get Ianto to fall asleep, but this time he had figured Jack would want to have more control over the situation and so he'd let things play out with as little interference as he could. Still, when he heard Jack speak up, talking to him since Ianto was now asleep, he opened his eyes, obviously wide awake, and gave Jack an honest smile.

"Yeah, I do," he said. "I..." He smile faltered and then dropped, though his tone was no less optimistic. "I wasn't sure, at first. I didn't know this was happening until tonight - if I had known sooner, he'd already have seen McCoy, community be damned. But now that we know it's happening, that things aren't getting better, that Dr. Watson hasn't been able to help? Now I will do everything in my power to fix it." He gave Jack a pointed look. "And we both know that I really do everything to make things better."

Jack settled back against the pillows he was leaning on, careful not to jostle Ianto too much, although he knew that he wouldn't be waking the other man up if he did shift a little underneath him. "So...John knew about this, then?" he asked. Ianto hadn't shared that information when he'd told Jack about it before in the kitchen, although Jack really hadn't been listening for any extra information on the topic either, really. "Well, that's something at least. That he had gone to someone else that might have been able to help him in this..."

He ran his hand through Ianto's hair again, sighing. "I know that you're going to do everything you can for him. Hell, I'll do anything I can too. Just say the word and I'll be there. But. This isn't something I can fix. I... I mean, I could try," he said, softly. "There's. There's this thing that I can do. Share my life energy with him. But...with this amulet business, and all, I...I'm afraid it might not have the right effect. I don't want to go messing with metaphysics like that, when there's something a bit more scientific that might be able to fix it..." He looked to Sulu, over the top of Ianto's head. "...you really believe in this Doctor McCoy of yours, then? That he'll be able to handle something like this, something that's probably never even existed in your universe, and probably never will."

"I think so, yeah. He mentioned some of the stuff John was telling him to do to help with the symptoms." He watched Jack pet Ianto's hair, shifting a bit to keep an eye on Jack as he spoke. Really, he wished that they could risk it. He wanted Jack to be able to do this, to help Ianto get better in a physical way, rather than only being there for Ianto. Especially since Jack seemed so hesitant right now, as sure as he was that Ianto was going to die again and that there'd be nothing to stop it. Even now, Sulu had a feeling that was why Jack was staying; to pay some kind of last respect.

"Jack," he said after a moment of silence, reaching out to put his free hand on Jack's arm. "I know this is hard. It's hard for me too. To know that this isn't going as flawlessly as we had thought it would. Believe me, it is. But we both know we're too stubborn to give up until we've exhausted all our options. And if McCoy can't fix this, we'll look for someone else who can." He squeezed Jack's arm, trying to reassure him that no matter what, things were going to work out, even if only by pure force of will.

Jack regarded Sulu with guarded eyes. He knew that they would do everything they could to make things better. He just wasn't sure that everything they could would be enough, this time. Hell, he couldn't get his hopes up again only to have them crushed, he couldn't. He knew that it was a race against time, now, to find a cure, and who knows how much worse things would get, if McCoy couldn't do anything about it, in the end. How much time did they have for the doctor to figure out whether or not he could do anything? How much time did they have...in all?

"...I can't lose him again, Sulu," he said, quietly. "I can't let myself believe you on this, and then lose him again. So I..." He chewed his lip, lowering his eyes to Ianto, sleeping deeply, lying there between them. "I want to believe you, that we'll find something, that it'll work out, that McCoy will fix this, but. I mean. If he can't... If there really isn't anything to be done..." He shook his head, shutting his eyes, not even able to put into words how completely broken he would be, after a blow like that. "I can't let myself believe you, but I'm going to try. ...believing in this, in a cure, that's all I have left. So. We can't let this take him, Sulu," he said quietly, fiercely, "we can't."

Sulu understood Jack's situation and feelings more than he could ever say. There was no way Sulu could promise they would fix this, not really, and there was no way to convince Jack that he should believe anything he was saying. But he understood the feeling behind everything Jack was saying and, more than anything, he could understand the determination Jack was showing him now. Even if Jack couldn't believe they could fix it, he believed that they could try. And he knew how Jack would feel if this didn't work out.

"I know," he said, as sincerely and firmly as possible, "I know we can't, and we won't. I don't care what we have to do. I promise you, Jack, I'm not giving this up until I've tried everything."

Jack looked at the other man again, nodding slightly. "That's all I can ask of you, Sulu. It's...it's more than I would ever dream of asking of anyone, really, but I know that it's not because of me that you're doing that, but for him as well, for yourself." He quirked the smallest of smiles at Sulu. "I know that regardless of what I tell you to do, you're going to try your hardest, and I appreciate that, I really do. I'm... I'm going to try myself as well. However..." He trailed off, biting his lip.

"There's not much I can do for him, while he's seeing your Doctor McCoy. I'll. I'll be on call the whole time, I'll have my phone with me, but. Even though Torchwood's not exactly in operation right now, even if we don't have a base or a team or anything like that...I can't just leave here and come spend time there. I did that enough already, in that week I spent with you. I..." If this didn't work, then he'd do it again, only next time, he wasn't going to come back. Couldn't come back, and spend time in Cardiff without Ianto. Too many ghosts, as there were, and much as he loved Gwen and Torchwood, neither of them would be enough to keep him tied down, without Ianto as his anchor on it all.

He didn't even realize how much the other man had meant to him, until it'd been far too late. Even now... He was still too late. He wondered if there would ever be a time when he believed that he was ready to let someone go. If so, he'd never experienced one before, yet, and he'd lived long enough that if it were possible, he really should have by then. He shook himself out of those thoughts. "You're going to have to be the one to keep me informed," he said. "Think you can do that, Lieutenant?"

"It's alright," Sulu said honestly. "I understand. Work isn't going to stop because of this, and if you want to get Torchwood back up on its feet..." If Jack wanted to get it back up on its feet. "You're going to need to invest time in it. Ianto will understand that too." He knew Ianto would - they both had to know that, right? Ianto was as passionate about his job as Sulu was; at least, that was how it had always seemed, though Ianto was much quieter about it.

"I'll keep in touch and make sure you know what's going on. If you want to come see him, I'll make sure I can arrange a time for you to do that, between what you have to do and what McCoy will have to do." He almost asked then what Jack would do, if this did work - which it would, damn it - about Ianto and Torchwood. Would he try to get him out of it before it even started again? Or would he accept the fact that Ianto, probably the most stubborn out of the three of them, wouldn't let go of his job without one hell of a fight?

Jack wasn't sure if it was that he wanted to get Torchwood back up on its feet or more that he knew that he needed to get it there as soon as possible. That just because this thing with the 456 had happened recently, that didn't mean that they were off the hook by any means. Any minute then, Jack could get a call to his cell, rigged up through the rift spike program, somehow still functional despite the disaster area that was the Hub at that moment, and that could be it. Torchwood needed him, it needed to exist, at least until a new organization stepped in and showed itself up to the challenge.

"I don't want to get in McCoy's way," Jack said, quietly, "but. That would help me. To be able to visit. To at least...well. To know what's going on. To know if..." He sighed, deeply. "To know when he's coming home. Coming back. When he gets better; if he gets worse. I... I need to know if that's the case, so that. So that I can at least try to be there..." He turned his eyes to the ceiling, sighing again. "You can give McCoy my contact information as well. In case something comes up while you're on-duty, or something. In case he'd like to get a hold of me, for whatever reason." Including talking. Who knows what the doctor might want, given the opportunity to speak to him.

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