[RL WITH SULU]

[torchwoodteaboy]

It'd been a week. A week since that first day that he'd come back from the hospital, and Sulu had had to help him around his flat. A week, most of which he'd spent in a sort of semi-conscious, fatigued and weary state, shuffling about trying to get the necessary things done, but only just succeeding. As Ianto sat on the edge of his bed, just having gotten up from what had been his second nap of the day, and not feeling any better after having taken it, the world spinning around him from having sat up too fast, even though he'd paced himself and been extra careful not to, Ianto had the sinking feeling that in that whole week, he hadn't gotten better at all. Sulu had stuck around until his leave had been up, like he said he would, and then once he'd left, Jack had popped in a few times during the day to help out with chores (he was surprisingly good at doing the dishes and the laundry) and then at night to lie with him (even if Jack didn't sleep and Ianto felt like he was wasting the other man's time). And yet. In that whole week, nothing had changed. Nothing had gotten better. And Ianto was getting sick and tired of being sick and tired, and Jack was great to have around, but. He didn't really understand what it was like to be ill, and sometimes that wore on Ianto even more than not having him around at all.

And now, as the sun was setting, and Jack was off on a sudden call to London, Gwen doing god knows what with Rhys, Ianto wasn't about to disturb their peace, it was all starting to get at Ianto. The darkness was creeping in, and he was beginning to think that maybe he wasn't getting better at all. That maybe he'd never get better. Maybe this was how things would be, from now on. Maybe the darkness really would come for him, because it didn't seem like it would ever really let him go again, and Ianto swallowed against the swell of panic rising in his stomach. He... He couldn't do this. He knew that he didn't want to bother Sulu. That he had specifically refrained from calling him out of the blue for anything since he'd left to go back to his ship, instead waiting for Sulu himself to make the first contact, but. He. He really needed someone there with him. Someone real. Someone who understood and could chase the demons away like he promised he would. And so Ianto did the only thing that he could think of to help, and pulled out his phone to dial the number to Sulu's comm.

Comments

[torchwoodteaboy]

"You and me both," Ianto murmured, at Sulu's admittance that he was tired. "And I understand about the sitting being exhausting. Not just given the present situation, but. I mean, I've been on stakeouts. Or left behind to monitor the satellite feed and he likes in the Hub. It's hard, to be on your guard and not actually really doing anything for that long. Or...researching something. It's kind of the same there, as well." He chuckled, softly. "Why d'you think I started with coffee in the first place?" Besides the fact that Lisa liked it... "It gives you enough of a kick to get through that sort of thing."

Ianto could feel himself starting to drift again. His momentary deep conversation with Sulu had snapped him out of it a little, but now that he didn't really need to pay attention to what he was saying or what was being said to him, he let himself start to drift a little. "You should try having some on a shift, sometime. If they let you, that is." Ianto had no idea what it was like, piloting a spaceship. Or even being in the bridge. The one time he'd seen the place, the ship had been grounded, as it were.

[parked]

Sulu imagined that it wouldn't be too hard to get some coffee while on shift, really. There was a replicator on the bridge, for the times when it might be needed, but he couldn't imagine how bad the coffee would be compared to Ianto's brew. He smiled. "With any luck, I won't need it to get through the day shift. And then I won't have to worry about suffering through bad coffee, if I can come down and have some of yours."

He could feel Ianto sinking just slightly against him and knew that the other was starting to get sleepy. In any other position, Sulu would be telling Ianto that maybe it was time to get out, but the water was still hot enough that it was only going to help, and he was holding Ianto so that he wouldn't sink under the water. So he just continued to rub Ianto's shoulder, figuring that letting him sleep for a few minutes wouldn't be too bad.

[torchwoodteaboy]

"Mmm," Ianto said, "'d be happy to make you coffee. Never deny a man a good cuppa," he murmured, trying to fight to stay conscious, but it really was a losing battle there, at the moment. Especially when it was so warm in the water, and he was finally feeling warm for the first time in weeks, and Sulu was there to make sure he didn't drown if he suddenly passed out on him, so. He figured if it weren't allowed, he'd just get woken up after a moment.

As he drifted, he started to muse on what sort of coffee a replicator would make, anyway. What determined the quality that replicators replicated food into, anyway? Was it that someone had taken what they considered to be a normal version of that food and programmed the chemical specifics into the machine, or...? Couldn't they have gotten someone to make a slightly better version of whatever it was before they had to go and finalize it? He wondered if you could influence the machine to make better versions of food or drinks, or whether it would be stuck as it was forever. He wouldn't mind it being stuck. He'd be a bit cross if a machine started pumping out coffee the same quality as he had it when he had to work for it and it just came naturally there.

"Could get you a thermos or somethin'," he mused.

[parked]

Sulu laughed quietly and moved to pet Ianto's hair, completely unable to follow Ianto's train of thought but willing to jump it anyway. It was obvious that Ianto was getting close to passing out, and he figured he could give him maybe ten minutes before he should wake Ianto up and get them both out of the bath and into Ianto's bed.

"I'd like that," he said softly, combing his fingers through his hair, "It'd be nice to be able to have your coffee with me on bridge. I'm not sure if I can, but I could probably convince people it's all right." After all, he had no problem bending rules, whether it was for him or his crewmates. The Enterprise was all about bending the rules, after all.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto hummed appreciatively under his breath, both at the idea of Sulu bringing some of his coffee with him onto the Enterprise, and also at the feeling of Sulu's fingers in his hair. Sulu should have known better than to start petting his hair, though, if he wanted Ianto to stay awake at all. Sure enough, not very long after Sulu had started the continuous, soothing motion of running his fingers through Ianto's hair, Ianto shifted his head to the side in a last minute attempt to keep his head from lolling at quite so awkward an angle, slowly letting himself fall asleep.

It wasn't just that Ianto was falling asleep, though. He'd slept a bunch of times before that day. But there in the bath, Ianto was finally warm after being so very cold for so long. He knew that he was safe, that for the time being Sulu would keep him safe and warm and keep his head above the water for that matter, and that was all he needed to absolutely conk out. He would have felt a little guilty about it, but there was such an overwhelming feeling of relief that washed over him that he couldn't really bring himself to care all that much before he was out completely.

[parked]

Sulu could feel exactly when Ianto finally passed out, and he sighed a little in a mixture of relief and contentedness. After so much time with Ianto feeling as ill as he did, making only a little headway and then having a relapse like he did tonight, Sulu was grateful to get this time with Ianto where the man wasn't feeling exhausted, just sleepy; where he wasn't shivering or scared of some kind of intangible force that Sulu knew he could never defend Ianto from.

He continued to stroke Ianto's hair as he slept, closing his eyes himself and just taking in the warmth of the tub and, now, the warmth he could feel from Ianto. It was strange to feel this peaceful after so long; he'd been tense, lately, too tense, and even though he'd broken away from returning to his reclusive nature, there was a wall again between him and other people. He hadn't been feeling like himself, lately, which was a disorienting and uncomfortable situation for him. He didn't like feeling so hopeless all the time. He didn't like feeling out of control. But right now, thankfully, all of that seemed a million miles away. He knew this wouldn't last, and that Ianto was going to cool off again and maybe he'd never get better, but right then and there, Sulu knew they could handle it.

He hadn't even realized it, but he'd been dozing a little - not enough to actually count as sleep, but it was enough to make the cooling water suddenly noticeable. It must've been ten minutes, but Sulu knew that Ianto was going to have to get out of the tub soon - him too. They could take to the bed, after this, and hopefully the warmth wouldn't rush out of Ianto too quickly.

With a gentle shake of his shoulder, Sulu shifted up a bit more, holding Ianto up with him, and said, "Hey, Ianto, I think it's time to get out."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto took in a long breath as he woke up, both at the shaking of his shoulder and at the shifting. Almost immediately, he did notice the change in the water temperature, and had to wonder how long Sulu had humored him and let him sleep there. He raised a hand to rub at his eyes, and judging by the state of his fingers and how they weren't completely pruning, it couldn't have been too long. The water was getting cooler, however, and they should probably get out before it started having the reverse effect on him than why they'd got in in the first place.

"...yeah," he said, his voice a bit rough, given the fact that he'd just woken up from a surprisingly deep sleep, really, given the situation and short amount of time it'd been. "Alright." He put his hands on the sides of the tub and carefully shifted until he was sitting up straight, needing a moment before he even thought of attempting to stand. "Sorry," he mumbled, apologizing for falling asleep, but more out of habit than really because he felt all that bad about having done so.

[parked]

Sulu smiled as Ianto shifted forward, deciding that it would probably be better to give him as much time as possible to get ready to stand. If he needed Sulu to help him, he knew that Ianto would ask; or, at least, he hoped he'd ask. The last thing Sulu needed was to deal with Ianto getting a concussion.

"Don't worry," Sulu responded, waving a hand in dismissal. "It wasn't that long, and I figured you could use a little down time in the water. But since it's cooling off..." He trailed off, figuring it was pretty obvious where his thought process had gone. If he was being completely honest, though, he was getting pretty tired himself, and he knew they could both use a few hours sleep. "Did you take the blankets from your bed downstairs?" he asked, in case he needed to go get them.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto blushed, nodding slightly. "Yeah, I..." he said, awkwardly. "I don't really own that many. Never really had to, since there's just me living here and all, so. I mean. I have some more in storage, but that's..." Too much effort really. He shrugged. "So yeah. Blankets are still downstairs, I guess." He sent Sulu an apologetic look over his shoulder, not really wanting to apologize aloud so soon after he'd just done so.

He raised an arm to rub across the back of his neck, and from that movement alone, was pretty much positive that he wasn't going to be getting up out of the tub without help. It was just too low and he was far too relaxed to even try to attempt it, not without tripping and knocking himself out on the edge of the sink or the tiles or god knows what else he could end up doing to himself. "I think, for the sake of both of us, I'm probably going to need you to help me up," he said, too tired to even be embarrassed about having to ask. "And, y'know..." he motioned idly to the side of the tub, "over, I suppose."

[parked]

"Sure," Sulu said as Ianto asked for help. It took him a few moments to get himself standing, but then he climbed out of the tub. Pausing for a second, he turned and grabbed one of the towels, wrapping it around his waist before taking another one, holding it over his (mostly) dry arm. He wasn't about to make Ianto get out and stand shivering until one of them could grab him a towel after all; might as well get it out of the way first.

Moving back to the tub, he gently took Ianto's arms, waiting for him to get his footing before helping him up, his footing and posture firm enough to provide Ianto with support as he climbed over the edge of the tub himself. Stepping close, Sulu took the towel from his arm and looped it around Ianto's waist, kissing him gently at the same time as if to distract him from the fact that he was trying to make sure there was as little work as possible for Ianto. "I can go get the blankets, if you'd like."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto recognized what Sulu was doing, both with putting wrapping the towel around his waist as well as the kissing him to try and distract him from it, perhaps, but a kiss was a kiss, and so Ianto didn't really care about Sulu doing that for him, not in that moment as he kissed Sulu back briefly. The air was cold, but he'd gotten a towel pretty quickly secured around him, and the warmth wasn't seeping out of him or anything ridiculous like that.

Ianto smiled at offer and nodded. "Yeah, I... I think you'd better." He stepped back, raising an eyebrow at Sulu, still smiling, but making a bit of a face. "I think I can handle making it to the bedroom by myself, if you'd like to go do that in the meanwhile. It is just right around the corner, and all..."

[parked]

"I trust you to be able to do it," Sulu responded, returning the smile and running his hands up Ianto's sides briefly before stepping away himself. "I'll be right back with those, then," he said, before heading out of the bathroom. The air was a bit colder out here, the heat from the bath having made the bathroom pretty warm, and so Sulu hurried down the stairs, holding on to his towel as he went. The idea of maybe dressing again didn't even pass through his mind at this point; he was too tired and eager to curl up in bed with Ianto to think about putting on his uniform again. If Ianto asked him to put some clothes on, he could always jump back to his cabin and pick something up, but...

Finding the blankets where they'd left them, Sulu bundled them up in his arms and made his way back up the stairs, shifting the load in his arms around so he could once again grab his towel, and he made straight for the bedroom. "Here we go," he said as he entered, holding up the blankets.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Watching Sulu go for a moment, Ianto turned and, gripping the side of the tub, pulled the stopper, letting the water run out. Seeing to it that everything else was dealt with, he bent and picked up his clothes, hesitating before grabbing Sulu's clothes as well. His own, he just balled up and threw in the hamper, but. Sulu's, he at least took the care to treat properly. As Sulu came into the bedroom, Ianto stepped up to him. "I believe this is yours," he said, handing Sulu his uniform and taking the blankets off of him with a smile.

It was a bit of a challenge, to dress the bed and not lose his towel at the same time, but he succeeded after only a little more time than it normally would've taken him, stepping back to admire his handiwork. It...well, he'd really only just thrown the blankets on top of the sheets, but it was made as far as he was concerned. "God," he said, laughing and bringing a hand up to rub his eyes, "I'm going to warn you now, I'm probably going to sleep like a rock, once I fall asleep again..."

[parked]

Sulu took his uniform with a grateful smile, taking a few moments to fold them correctly; at the very least, if he overslept here he wouldn't have to show up in wrinkled clothes. The idea of sleeping, of passing out with Ianto in his bed, both of them warm for the first time since Ianto'd been brought back - it was a good idea. One he relished, even.

"No problem," Sulu responded, turning once he'd folded up his uniform and then put it aside, "I'm not going to mind. You're just as attractive when you sleep, anyway, so it's not like the view's going to change." He couldn't help the comment, grinning a bit cheekily as he came over to Ianto, putting his hands on his hips and giving him a brief kiss. "I'm a little more interested in passing out anyway, than making you stay up and talk. So don't worry about it."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto smiled and shook his head at Sulu's complimenting him, but was grateful both for the compliment and the fact that Sulu was planning on going right to sleep as well. Not that he didn't like to talk, but as soon as he got comfortable again, lying down with Sulu under the blankets, warm and content, he'd probably be out like a light and not looking to be up for a while. Not until Sulu had to leave, at least. Which he could only hope the other man would think to wake him up for. It seemed silly to want to ask, but...

"Should you be setting some sort of an alarm?" he asked. "So I don't keep you here for too long, or anything?" Not that he'd mind keeping Sulu there for longer, but he didn't want to keep him from his job. If Sulu didn't want to dig out his comm to set an alarm, there was always the alarm clock on the nightstand beside Ianto's bed that he could set. Or his phone, which he'd remembered to dig out of his clothes before he tossed them in his hamper and had set on the nightstand as well.

[parked]

Sulu waved a hand. "Already have one. It'll wake me up with enough time to spare." He was almost a little compulsive when it came to his alarms; he always had them set in intervals so he would have enough time to shower, eat and check his plants before shift started. "We'll be fine. And I'll make sure to wake you up before I go."

Sulu considered for a moment whether or not he should wait for Ianto to climb under the covers, but the fact was that even he was feeling a little chilly in the flat with just a towel. So instead, he slipped under the covers first, tossing his towel so that it landed in a slightly folded heap on the trunk at the end of the bed, and reached over to hold the other side of the blankets up for Ianto. "Come on, it's cold out there even by my standards."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto quirked a smile and quickly climbed into the bed much as Sulu did, tossing the towel to join his on the trunk at the end of the bed and slipping under the covers as Sulu held them up for him. "Are your standards for cold different than most other people's, then?" he mused, sliding close to Sulu as much for the warmth as for the comfort and because he simply wanted to curl up with the other man for the night and sleep forever. Or, well. Until Sulu had to get up.

"Could you wake me up before you have to leave, though? I mean. As much as I like sleeping, I'd rather not...y'know." He blushed, ducking his head. He'd rather not have to wake up in the morning to an empty flat. Much as he appreciated Jack's company, he still hadn't trained the other man not to leave if he got too restless. At least Sulu seemed to understand that he needed something in parting, even it was as simple as an 'I'm leaving, see you later'.

[parked]

"Pavel practically gloats about how he can handle Siberian winters," Sulu said to hide the fact that, frankly, Ianto's standards for cold had to be lower than normal, given the fact that he was now cold so often. As Ianto slid close to him, Sulu wrapped his arms around him, one around his side and the other around his shoulders, holding him close and pressing his lips to his forehead.

"I'll gladly wake you up, don't worry," Sulu said, smiling against his forehead. "Hell, I can try making you breakfast, first, if you want. I'm... not sure what time it'll be, though, so that might not be the best idea I've ever had. Don't worry, though, I won't leave without my kiss goodbye."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto smiled at Sulu's words, shifting to place a hand on Sulu's chest, his other resting lightly on his side. "If you think you can make something without burning the house down, you're more than welcome to try. Regardless of what time it is. I... I might even be looking forward to it, now," he said, laughing a little.

That is...if he was still feeling this good when Sulu's alarm woke him up. Ianto didn't really know for sure. He wanted to believe that he would, that the bath was all he'd needed to jumpstart everything, but. He'd taken baths before then, and granted, they had probably been colder than the one he'd taken most recently, their effects had worn off after a while too. He couldn't guarantee that he'd be up for breakfast the next morning, although he'd try his hardest to be. He just wanted things to be nice and normal like they were in that moment.

"You don't have to," he said, realizing he'd paused there. "Regardless, though, I'm going to keep you to your word on that kiss goodbye. And maybe even..." He trailed off, smirking, before he moved his hand from Sulu's cheek, tilting his head back to look at Sulu. "...maybe I could get a kiss goodnight as well?"

[parked]

Sulu was banking on the fact that Ianto would feel better. He didn't know how he was going to be able to take it, if Ianto woke up feeling miserable again. It was going so well... But he knew that he would take it as smoothly as he could, no matter what happened. If he didn't feel well, Sulu hoped that there would be enough time for them to have another bath, to help him get warm again. And if that wasn't possible, then he could at least make him something to eat, so Ianto wouldn't have to make the trek downstairs and then make food for himself.

Smiling, he tilted his head down. "Since you asked so nicely," he murmured, pressing his lips against Ianto's. This was something that he loved about their time together; the moments where he could just kiss Ianto and forget about all the things that were bothering him.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto kissed Sulu back, smiling into it because really, at that moment, he could almost forget that there was anything wrong with the situation at all. He could almost forget that he'd spent the day spiraling into a downwards cycle that culminated in a semi-breakdown and hours of sitting out in the doorway to his back garden, just staring out into the darkness. He could almost forget why he needed to have a bath in the first place, that anything had ever been wrong with him. If only it weren't for the amulet hung around his neck, its solid presence alerting him to it all every time he noticed it there.

Ianto broke their kiss after a moment, moving to duck his head against Sulu's chest, curling up against the other man's side. "...thank you," he said, after a moment of silence. "For...y'know. Coming down tonight. I. I needed this. Rather badly." Not just the presence of someone else, or even for Sulu's presence in particular. He needed some time to feel...well, normal again. Even if it was only temporary. It had been getting to him, being cold and tired and ill. And well...he was still tired, but the other two were gone at the moment, and it was so much of a relief, he could cry. If he hadn't done enough of that already that day, that was.

[parked]

"I'll always come when you call," Sulu said softly, resting his chin against the crown of Ianto's head. "I had to wait this time, but I'll fix that." And he would. He'd talk to Jim and arrange a different schedule, pull as many favors as he had - whatever it took, Sulu would do it. He closed his eyes, taking a slow, calming breath before letting it out in a contented sigh.

"Really, though," he added, "I want to be with you. None of this is a hassle for me, so I never want you to think otherwise, okay?" He ran his one hand up Ianto's back, the other rubbing Ianto's shoulders, staying clear of the leather strap. He almost wanted to touch it, but at the same time, he had no idea how Ianto would react - how it would react. He'd brushed against the strap before, but actually touching it... no. He didn't want to risk it.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto noticed that Sulu hadn't really so much as gone near the amulet since he'd gotten home, not really. Sure, he'd brushed against the strap a couple of times, and having Ianto pressed up against him so often, he'd probably come into contact with the amulet itself too, but. Actually going out of his way to even so much as acknowledge the thing... Sulu really hadn't done that. And he didn't blame him, really. It unnerved him a little too, but he had it hanging around his neck, so he had to acknowledge it, at the very least.

He knew that he'd told Sulu that he would probably be out as soon as he got comfortable, but. He wasn't quite there, yet. Just lying down wasn't enough, he was going to have to get there mentally again. Which meant talking. So. Might as well broach the subject that he could tell was on both of their minds. "...I don't think I'll be able to take it off, y'know," he said, quietly. "The amulet. I... I don't know if..." he trailed off, because they both knew why. "It's alright, though. You don't need to avoid it. I mean, Jack's had a look at it before, and nothing happened then, so..."

[parked]

Sulu frowned to himself, realizing that he had been a bit more obvious about not touching the amulet than even he had realized. "I know," he responded in the same quiet tone Ianto was using. "I didn't touch it much when it was with us and not you, is all." He'd been worried, even then, that if he touched it something awful would happen.

With a slow shift of his arm, he brought his hand between them and wrapped it lightly around the amulet, feeling the weight. It wasn't... bad, really - he knew that it was what had brought Ianto back to life and, for all they knew, what was keeping him going - but the very presence of it was a reminder of what had happened. "It's nice, though," he said finally, a smile in his voice, "At least it's not really gaudy or huge. That'd be a little harder to deal with. I... I hope you don't dislike it." But the way he said it - he wasn't really talking about just the amulet. He was talking about all of it; the resurrection, the fact that he was still feeling ill, the fact that Jack and Sulu had brought him back without knowing what he'd really want. It was a silly fear, he knew, but it was still one that plagued him from time to time.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto smiled at the idea of some other sorts of amulets he could be stuck with. He ducked his head to look at the one hanging around his neck, the one he owed his life to, cupped in Sulu's hand. He did catch the tone of the question there, though. Understood that Sulu wasn't asking just about the amulet, but about the situation in general. And it took him a moment to formulate an answer to it.

It wasn't that he resented them bringing him back. He was so, so grateful for it, for them saving him. He just... He wished that he didn't have to put up with everything else on top of that. He wished that he were better. He should be better by then. But he wasn't, and... "I love it," he said. "I mean. It'll take some getting used to. I'm not the jewelry type, really, but. If that's what it takes to be here, like this, with you... Then that's fine with me. All of it," he said, raising his eyes to look at Sulu, pointedly.